have you ever been lost in your entire life?lost and still finding ways to unravel the mysteries or the mistaken turns that you took on the previous crossroads that you've been?I for one is lost on this journey,i kept on undoing the mistakes of my past and yet here i am still on the verge of falling apart...but as soon as i realize it.reality keeps me in check.how can you undo a mistake?how can you turn a new leaf?a new lease of life?i always try to keep a happy face facing each morning with smiles and new hope. But the gloomy past is thrown at me with full brute force by one man.
"you will be poor when i'm gone...."said the man."you are nothing..who will help you?them?they left you out on that dark road alone and with nothing but spare clothes and change.I tell you boy,you will die in poverty."
so as my mornings continue to arrive i will forever be chained in this life of routine litany of discouragement and orders to shape up.shape up?its true,that until know i don't have a shelter of my own..no food to provide for myself.who's fault is it?its all mine and im not blaming anyone except myself.
but how can i start anew when you im constantly reminded of the mistakes that ive done?will history be drilled into your head whenever you are about to start anew?
"you are not a good person.stop pretending that you are nice and good.you are bad to the core.don't preach and stop that holier than thou crap.you will never change.you are lazy and dumb.are nothing."these thoughts from the man's sermon kept me on alert.
so how will i start?will there be new mornings?or is hoping futile and therefore i shall bury the internal sunshine of my soul?
tell me how...tell me what....tell me now.
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